Slave to Inspiration

For so long I have feared living a life of insignificance. I’m afraid of being normal,  boring, and unimportant. Ever since I was little I wanted to be famous. First I wanted to be a singer, then a Dallas Cowboys cheerleader, then a D1 basketball player and be on TV. All of my dreams included what I call “being somebody.” From a young age I began buying the lie that I was never going to be anybody unless I had a platform.

Don’t get me wrong having a platform and using it to make the name of Jesus famous is an incredible opportunity – but feeling that you have to have thousands of listeners in order to spread your message is wrong.

If I’m being honest, that idea that I need to be famous in order to be somebody isn’t just a thing from when I was 6 years old. It is something I deal with every single day when I wake up and get ready to go to work in a dental office. A job that I tell myself is “insignificant.”

But I am learning. At least I am trying to. I am trying to submit my dreams to God and accept the fact that His plan for my life may be a simple life on the farm. And to some people that may sound pleasant, but to me that scares the living crap out of me. Everyone wants to leave their mark and feel like they have impacted someone’s life for the better. But if there is one thing I am clinging to, it is that my worth does not come from how many people I inspire.

I am not sharing this because I have this subject all figured out, in fact I am still struggling with this concept every day. But I have a feeling I’m not the only one. So take rest in knowing you don’t have to be inspiring to anyone on this planet (even if you really really want to be). You are worth so much more than the number of people you inspire.

Walk worthy.

XO

Jayna Elizabeth

 

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